What matters most in this life? What are we all looking for? What is our purpose or sense of meaning? A great insight into the things that actually matter can be found in our tears. I find that when I cry, that is when I need to pay the most attention. Because something deep within me says, “this matters so much, I am now going to cause you to leak in the form of a tangible emotion.” I think tears are an insight to the soul. I was heading out to Yosemite National Park to photograph an engagement session, an elopement, and a bunch of random strangers I bumped into along the way. As I wrote a note to my wife and my girls before I left, I began to cry uncontrollably. But why? As I was writing, I realized I was terrified of this adventure and that I was going to miss the hell out of these humans that drive me absolutely nuts.
Thoughts from Todd Henry’s book Die Empty
“When you look back on your life, the moments you will be most proud of will likely be the ones where you stepped out of your comfort zone in the pursuit of something you believed in. Don’t allow the lull of comfort to keep you trapped in a place of complacency and subpar engagement.” -Todd Henry
I have yet to meet someone who doesn’t like to Netflix and chill. Throw a pizza into the mix and you aren’t very far from heaven on planet earth. However, with something this glorious, there has to be a “but”. So what is the “but”? Well, sometimes relaxing and enjoying yourself or just taking it easy is a great thing to do. The problem is that this constant connection that we have with all our devices, all of these comfort foods like Netflix, social media, and even just sitting around on our ass at home, are causing us to seek comfort over new experiences, over truly living.
Recently I headed out west to San Fransisco and Yosemite for a little time away to focus on my business and to retreat, get summa dat soul rest if you feel me. This sounds like a totally amazing experience in an amazing place. So why did I feel like I was going to have a panic attack the day before I left? To be honest this was way outside of my comfort zone. Not the actual being in Yosemite or San Fran, but all the adulting that would take place in between. Catching the flight, getting the rental car, getting to my destinations. Side note and pro tip: if you ever rent a car, say “NO” to everything they offer and just get the damn car. They offered everything from insurance (which your regular car insurance will actually cover you) to filling up the gas tank upon return at a highly inflated rate, to paying for tolls (which I only came across 1 the entire time and it was $5, while they wanted to charge $30). Don’t fall for it. Side note over and out.
Some people fly all the time for work, or travel a lot, and this is simply not me. Take these two as an example, Hannah and Jason have a van that they travel around in all over the West Coast. Adventure feeds their souls. I have an adventurous spirit, but when it comes down to things sometimes I think of all the possible scenarios in which something could go wrong. I was joking about getting eaten by a bear in Yosemite because I am actually afraid of getting mauled by a bear. I joked to my wife about the plane crashing and told her that it has been a good ride with her so far. I felt like my car was going to drive off a ravine as I drove into the colder higher elevations where snow comes in on a whim. I honestly felt like I was walking into my own death in a number of ways and I was actually narrating it out loud to myself. There was no escape from this certain death. This is all of course somewhat ridiculous, but this is where my mind went. I even had the thought, you can just stay here and eat the $2000 plus cost of the trip. I legit thought that, and then I had to laugh at myself, overcome my fear and get my ass out the door. I think that some people thrive off of the type of adventure I’m going on, but I had a lot of apprehension and anxiety, much to my surprise. I love exploring the mountains and nature in my hometown as there is an element of safety and control to that. Andrew, you are beginning to ramble, what is the point buddy?
The point is we work hard and we hustle to achieve more, to make more, and to contribute more to this world. But, what happens when we get too comfortable with things being easy? We don’t progress, we don’t grow, and we end up resentful of all these people we see on Facebook and Instagram living these amazing lives. Stagnation and resistance are killers that can easily win out, especially if we let the comfort of this world keep us from doing the things we really want to do.
I can honestly say now on the other side of this adventure that my heart and mind have realized the pure joy in exploring the earth and getting out in the wild away from what is domestic. I was high off my ass on the joy of being out in creation, amidst other like minded people, and surrounded by some of the great wonders of the earth.
What makes you go outside of your comfort zone? Throw a comment down below as I genuinely want to know. This is a great place to visit because real growth happens when we allow ourselves to embrace discomfort. Stop living a comfortable life and choosing comfort over adventure, choosing entertainment over truly engaging with others. There is nothing inherently wrong with comfort, but it is when we dwell in that place that we leave our hearts behind. There is greatness in discomfort, we just have to be willing to embrace it, and to even seek it out.
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